(B. C.) In The Beginning...
My entire universe revolved around the west Texas town of Lubbock where I grew up. At age 6, my parents divorced, and all six of us - me and my five sisters - went to live with Mom. My father retained enough influence over me to get me involved with the boy's choir at St. Lukes UMC, where I grew to love singing. I was constantly at church, every time there was a music function, but apart from that there was no spiritual involvement for me. Nevertheless, I count this church as the first place I began to search for God, and for real meaning in my life. A new minister joining the church had asked the choir master (who was like a surrogate father to all us boys, and generally a great man) to leave, in order to place someone more flamboyant. Angry, I decided I would not return. I left the church in pursuit of the world. This alone, however, does not explain all the reasons for my departure.I became aware of how much I needed my dad's presence. My mother was always there for me, but I gave her endless pain when she attempted to give my life some structure. I began to run with a different crowd of 'friends' from my high school, seeking their acceptance in the only way I knew how - I gave in to their pressure to conform. I began to experiment, cautiously, with cigarettes, and then with marijuana. I went with my new 'friends' and got others involved. One was Jerry Reynolds (ADVENT drummer). We became close friends, to the extent that his mother declared me her "other son". At some point, I discovered the opposite sex, and Jerry and I did not spend as much time together as before, but were still close.
Atten-hut!
Jerry, me and another friend decided to enter the military together after high school; the hardest thing I had ever done in my life was to leave my girlfriend, with whom I was desperately in love, for the military, but she was still there for me. After a few days, I began to wonder exactly what I'd done! However, we made it through bootcamp, and went to our first "real" base, Keesler AFB, Biloxi Ms. While I was there, I tried to call my girlfriend regularly, but it cost a lot of money to do that from a payphone and I was poor. During one of those calls she let me know that she cared for someone other than me. So not only was I hurting and far away from home, but I felt more alone than ever before, even with all the people around me and the rigors of military service to occupy me. As far as I was concerned, I had reached a new low. After seven months of training at Keesler AFB, Ms., I was sent to Offutt AFB (next to the town of Bellevue, Nebraska, just south of Omaha).
Enter God
Some Christian soul had left about fifty tracts scattered around the dayroom of the barracks at Keesler. They had colorful covers, and cartoons with stories of persons who had fallen into unhappy circumstances. The tracts showed these people asking God for mercy and deliverance for their eternal souls. I could relate to some of the stories they told. The back page was printed with the plan of salvation. I noticed the words, "WHAT YOU MUST DO 1) Admit your need..."; I usually skipped this part. Many of us enjoyed sitting around reading. After I completed training at Keesler and arrived at Offutt I found more of these. One day, I entered a latrine (military term for "community bathroom"), and in the course of events noticed a tract someone had left on the floor in the stall. I picked it up and began reading it. I decided to take it back to my room. As I lay in my bunk, I began to study the last page. For the first time, I began to realize that the God these tracts spoke of had been calling out to me. He knew how lonely I was, had known all along the secrets I clung to, everything I had done to avoid Him. I thought about the times I had called to Him, but seemingly He hadn't answered. I remembered the empty feelings from childhood, I could still feel the heavy sadness of my own lost relationship with one I thought I loved. I didn't have anything to lose. I was already broken. I asked God to save me, and prayed that He would take control of my life. I lay in bed after that prayer, wondering if I had just done something really stupid and useless; nothing had happened to me. I was still the same person. It seemed that nothing had changed. I felt just a little better, though. Kind of like I had settled a need.
A New Beginning
The next day, I woke and hurried through my usual morning ritual, and drove to work at the Strategic Air Command (SAC) command post. I didn't think I was different that day, but the people I worked with sure did. I hate to describe it in feelings (because salvation is independent of our emotions), but I noticed a new attitude toward my coworkers deep within myself, so subtle that I would have had a hard time putting a name to it or a finger on it. I remember passing by a guard desk on my way to perform my duties. The guard was reading a Bible, pausing now and then to check badges for proper area access. I stopped to talk awhile, and began asking questions about the Bible he was reading. Before I knew it, we were having our own Bible study right there at the post. A fellow technician named J. R. Jesson walked by, and joined in. After a few minutes of conversation, he turned and asked me directly, "Are you a Christian?" I thought of what had happened the previous night, and what the tract had said about Jesus being the Lord of my life, and knew that the answer was YES. He had changed me into a new creation without my even being aware of it. J. R. invited me to church, where I later was baptized. He became my roommate, and my discipler.
Since Then-
I married a wonderful woman (Marilyn) from Omaha. God's divine orchestration of human events has brought us to where we are currently living in the Dallas area. I am convinced that He has yet-unfulfilled plans for me, what they are I don't know yet, but I know that He has placed me with this group of guys in ADVENT to tell other people about God's goodness, love, and mercy, using the means He has placed at our disposal. Daily living is a struggle between flesh and spirit, just as the apostle Paul said it was, but God's grace is still sufficient. And there is, at last, the hope and assurance of eternal life.
How about you?
If I had been told that I would one day be standing in front of people telling them about my salvation and preaching Christ, I would have turned and run.
Many people are daily in the same situation; running from God. Are you running? His love reaches the length and width and depth
of the universe and beyond - where will you run to? He created you with a need to know Him. He loves you, because you are His own
creation, but He wants your love of your own free will. He loves you so much that He sent His only begotten Son (Jesus) to die so that your
sin could be forgiven, and you could spend eternity with God in His kingdom.
THAT'S LOVE!
You must decide whether you will accept His love or not, because He has given us freedom to decide, but know that there is nothing you can do to earn His love. It is His gift He offers to you, but you must decide whether to accept it. My prayer is that if you are reading this far, you will receive His love and rest from running. Feel free to e-mail me with questions. I don't know it all, but I can tell you what I do know, and maybe help you!
In His Name,
Kelley Thompson